ballet and such

I’ve never effectively danced a day in my life. I learned to pole dance for a play and I was in a wedding party where I had to ballroom dance. I have three weeks before the next semester starts and I have no idea what I’m going to do about my 8a.m. ballet class. I am going to make a fair attempt at staying optimistic but I am slightly scared of what will happen. I’m not exactly your stereotypical bulimic twig type that normally does ballet and my balance is honestly quite terrible.

When it comes to John I’ve noticed that we don’t really seem to talk as much as we did before. I’m just running out of things to say I guess. We used to always stay up late talking until the early hours of the morning, about nothing in particular. Secrets, life, love…the normal. I used to love to listen to him tell me story after story even when I had heard them several times already. With our work schedules we just haven’t had the time…I miss it. I miss having him around as much as he was before. I just hope that I am actually good for him. He has hopes and dreams and actually knows where he wants to go in life. I could only wish to have that. I want the best for him, whether it would be with me or not. As long as he’s happy and doing what he wants to do. I really do love him and I can’t believe I might just get my chance to spend my life with him. Obviously I can’t predict the future, but I can surely hope like hell.

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